Should I relocate?

April 10th, 2012 by xunler No comments »

Question: I am a college student. Years ago I moved away from my hometown. Recently I’ve been in contact with this guy whom I knew years ago and was thinking about moving back. I have been stuck with making a right decision. Please help.

Many people, almost 99% of the people around the world are carrying burdens with them, should I stay back for my friends, my family or even the love of my life? When a question arise, a reason is created by the mind hence ego is created.
There is no right or wrong in this matter. You are very young, go out see the world, it doesn’t matter is the place you want to do is relocating to another state or even another country, just go whenever your heart is telling you. Master used to say the heart is more sincere than the mind.
Sam is a great kid. When ask what he wants to be when grow up, he replies “My dad say to be a doctor can help the sick people in family, my mom say being an accountant can earn a lot of money, my grandma say I talk a lot so I can be a lawyer….”
A decision can be different at a different time. Do not reason out and create an illusion instead follow the heart.

© by Xunler at http://lifejourneyanswer.com

—As a disciple from great masters, XunLer is a meditator since 1999. You can find more of her works in http://lifejourneyanswer.com—

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Meditation experience is deteriorating

August 31st, 2011 by xunler 2 comments »

Question: I am a beginner in meditation. I am very good on the second time, I feel so relieve and at peace. I’m going to the fifth time but nothing was as good as the second time. Why is it so?

The reason is very simple. You are bringing your mind with you and you compare. You are saying why is the 5th time is not as good as the 2nd time? When comparison comes in, expectations and mind comes in.

You were at peace on the 2nd time because there was no comparison and no expectation. Do not remember the experience you have before but experience the moment-to-moment or rather seconds-to- seconds you are having. This moment is special to you and to you only. In fact, every breathing seconds to a human being is special because there is no single moment that is going to repeat in your whole life journey and there is not a single person in this world that is having the same life as you are. Even twins who look alike will not lead the same kind of life.

There are so many obligations and commitments on the outside, just that hour of mediation, embrace that hour that you have for yourself, experience your being. There is no comparison, no expectation but experience the gift universe is giving you, experience the life that flow through you. Have you ever thought why do you deserve this gift?

Being a beginner will not determine you have lesser of meditation experience but with tremendous life understanding and clarity will definitely lead you into the right path.

Do not expect, do not think, do not compare, eventually that moment will come to you but before that you cannot force it to happen.

© by Xunler at http://lifejourneyanswer.com

—As a disciple from great masters, XunLer is a meditator since 1999. You can find more of her works in http://lifejourneyanswer.com—

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I want to live a life with full of wisdom

August 27th, 2010 by xunler 1 comment »

Question: I know that to live a life full of wisdom I need to live with a peaceful heart. But now I have a lot of distractions in terms of material needs not only for myself but also for my family. What should I do? I want to live a life full of wisdom.

How to live a life with full of wisdom?

Wisdom is not book, not knowledge or an activity that can be cultivated. Civilization and behavior can be trained, nurtured or even abide with billions of rules and regulations.

The first step towards wisdom is un-learned the learned, to unburden yourself not to add burdens into yourself.

Needs is your distractions. By understand needs itself will lead you to understand your ego.

Wisdom is not something can be forced into. Wisdom has to be either coming from the previous life or some triggering is happening along your life which I call it “the wake up call”.

Do not rush into having wisdom because it is a life journey of experiences. Experience life, be aware of actions and understand your life, wisdom will come naturally when it is ready.

© by Xunler at http://lifejourneyanswer.com

—As a disciple from great masters, XunLer is a meditator since 1999. You can find more of her works in http://lifejourneyanswer.com—

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Single or multiple method of meditation?

June 22nd, 2010 by xunler No comments »

Question: I am into meditation. Do you think I should try multiple method of meditation or stick to one?
First of all, you have to search for a method which you like and feel most comfortable with. If you are feeling bored after several attempts it also means that you are practicing the method wrongly or even starting on the wrong foot.
The mind likes the word ‘multiple’ because with multiple, choices appear then ego appears. Try one that you are attracted to, that it is easy to absorb, that you are connected with feelings. It doesn’t matter if the feeling is happy or sad. Feeling is the main connection from the whole.
With one method alone, you will experience deeper meditation. However, rememberdo not be over obsess with meditation. It is just a tool towards understanding and experience.

© by Xunler at http://lifejourneyanswer.com
**As a disciple from great masters, XunLer is a meditator since 1999. You can find more of the author works in http://lifejourneyanswer.com**

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How do I convince people to be peaceful at heart?

April 17th, 2010 by xunler No comments »

Question: I was a very bad tempered person but after I joined a religion body I become more peaceful, how do I convince the ones I love to become more peaceful?

First of all, are you really peaceful in your heart? The answer is NO. Why? Because you talk about love ones, people who are important to you and etc.

Ones can only be peaceful if you are not burdened. You are not responsible to the people around you. I do not want to use the word love ones because the definition is incorrect. There are no love ones in this entire world because you can love this person at this moment but the next moment you may wish the same person going to ‘hell’.

People around you may be important to you at this point of time but not the next. I used to see a lot of parents calling their children ‘darling’ in that moment but the next moment the children are called ‘brat’ or even ‘monster’.

Love only happens from moment to moment and there are no love ones in this entire world, no matter it is your husband, your wife or even your children, there are expectations you demand from them. To convince people to be peaceful, is like dropping water into the ocean, which is to no avail, without any use.

Real peace can only be attained when there are no burden, no expectation. If a person still has links, expectations and burden, to be peaceful is just a trick to the mind.

I have heard: A marketing sales manager talking a fresh and new marketing executive in a in retail shop. “You just need to remember one thing, when you talk to potential customer, keep repeating the word, you need this, you need this to relax your body, you need this for your parents, you need this after a hard day work like today…”

Keep on repeating the same words will drive the person unconsciously to a certain things.
Nowadays, there are also techniques available to let you talk to yourself to gain confidence and etc. These are methods to tune your mind to certain things but it will not remain forever. Everything that has a start definitely has an end.

Again, every human being is unique and to be peaceful does not mean it is right as it may be just a trick that you are trying to be nice.

Remember, to be peaceful in yourself is not doing.

© by Xunler at http://lifejourneyanswer.com

—As a disciple from great masters, XunLer is a meditator since 1999. You can find more of the author works in http://lifejourneyanswer.com—

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Feeling hard to control emotions at times?

February 12th, 2010 by xunler 1 comment »

Question: I was insulted by someone at work today. I am losing my peace even though the issue that comes up is not entirely my fault. How can I gain mental peace? I am trying to meditate but failed as the thoughts keep haunting me.

The action of blaming is by another party (someone at work) and you are only re-acting to the situation. In the society that we are living today, people are re-acting to one another and emotions have become a chain.

I have heard: when a person angry at work, he scolds his subordinate. When his subordinate goes home, he scolds his wife, then his wife scolds their kid. Since the kid does not have anybody to vent his or her frustration, he vent his anger on a stray dog, that is how the chain reaction goes, always base on the action by somebody else.

When you say that you are trying to meditate in order to gain peace then it is a VERY wrong approach. You cannot force yourself to sit quietly when you are losing your peace. When you are angry your heart rate is increase and you are on high alertness, so it is very wrong to suppress the anger inside you. When you are angry or even not gaining peace then let IT be. There is nothing wrong with the feeling. In other words, you are giving ‘negative’ sign to your feelings.

Instead of trying to meditate when you are angry, let the awareness arises in you. It is pretty hard to begin awareness when you lost your cool. This is the reason why many masters have told disciples to have awareness and understanding at all times.

With awareness of emotions and through life understanding, you will gain the peace that you are searching. Meditation techniques are used for relaxation at your free time but it is not a tool to clam your nerves or to reverse your emotion or your feelings when you are feeling unrest.

© by Xunler at http://lifejourneyanswer.com
**As a disciple from great masters, XunLer is a meditator since 1999. You can find more of the author works in http://lifejourneyanswer.com**

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Why am I emotionless?

January 7th, 2010 by xunler 3 comments »

Question: I am so scared, I do not have any emotion, it already happened for 6 months. Is there something wrong with me? I need to be free. Please help.

First of all, every human being has emotion. Happiness and sadness is just the mirror image of each other.

You are shutting yourself away from the people around you assuming that friends and family do not understand you. There is nobody in this world understand the other unless this particular person has some insight on the bigger picture.

Do not create expectations for other to understand you either. Relying on people to understand you is as good as pushing responsibility to others. Each of us is an individual, account for yourself, for who you are.

There is a story, a few people had gone hunting and they came across a camp of a great master. The hunters looked into the camp and saw the disciples were whirling inside the camp. The hunters thought “These people must be mad, how can people find out the truth by doing this?” There is no history, no record saying truth can be found by whirling.
At sunset, the hunters were on their way back, they were thinking, by now, a lot of madness must have taken place in the master’s camp. To their surprise, all the disciples were sitting inside the camp with closed eyes.
A month had passed. It is the hunting season again. The hunters saw the camp, it is still there. To their surprised again, the camp is empty, only the master is in. All the disciples had gone. The hunters thought this guy must be crazy, all the people had escaped.
So, they asked the master “Where are your disciples? When we were here last month, there are a lot of people inside this camp.”
The master said “They had danced, they had found, they had absorbed and they had left. They will bring the next batch soon.”

Try to un-learned the learned, once you are being yourself again then freedom is all yours.

© by Xunler at http://lifejourneyanswer.com
—The author XunLer is a disciple from a great master is practicing meditation since 1999. Self-searching is the real route of all life journey. You can find more of the work in http://lifejourneyanswer.com—

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Relationship Problems and Inner Peace

December 28th, 2009 by xunler 2 comments »

Question: I am 28 and married for 5 years. This marriage was an arranged marriage. My husband is a nice guy from a very mediocre family from the countryside but he has many health problems. I have met a wonderful guy now and I need to know how can I be psychologically ready to resolve this problem?

Society is separating people into different social status. When there is a difference in class and status, people in the higher status would like to experience the luxury that they are having while the poor is striving to reach the better social status. If only the human being is able to see that there is no social status in the world, social status is created out of the ego, out of the nothingness.

And love is a very fragile bond, love may be flowing this moment but the next moment, it will not be there. Love will not exist forever but moment to moment. Things or matter that will not change or stagnant will become stink, spoiled just like water in a closed jar. Love is like an ocean, vast and with waves.

Human being should not live in the past in memories but living in the now, in this moment. In the east, there are quite a lot of things that people need to follow, a lot of traditions. I am not against traditions, there are lessons to learn from different traditions but these traditions needs to go through transition. The master say, if only the east and west merge then the real freedom may be possible.

There is no right or wrong in relationship and remember every human has their own journey. It may be difficult for you to choose a path but the journey is yours and you, only you, knows which path really fits you. Remember, every human being is special and unique.

© by Xunler at http://lifejourneyanswer.com

—The author XunLer is a disciple from a great master is practicing meditation since 1999. Self-searching is the real route of all life journey. You can find more at the above link.–

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Abondoning and inner self

December 18th, 2009 by xunler 1 comment »

Question: I am in my twenties. I live half a globe away from my parents which adopted me when I was 9. Festive season like this always makes me wondering why my real parents gave me up. How can this thought go away? Will it affect my inner life journey?

This thought cannot vanish into the air as you wish. Thoughts and mind are very alike. The more you tried to make it disappear the more it will come back to you.

Every single human being in this world IS very unique. There are no two similar persons in this world lead the same life experience. Each of the experience belongs only to you. There were sayings that “children are very unique to the parents”. This is not right because every human being is unique only to their own, nobody own the other. Please bear this in mind.

There are a lot of stories that sees only one sibling or one in the family begin their inner journey themselves. A very solid understanding and experience can lead ones to the path.

These may be your experience and your understanding that brings you to your inner self. It may be a good start for you.

© by Xunler at http://lifejourneyanswer.com

—The author XunLer is a disciple from a great master is practicing meditation since 1999. Self-searching is the real route of all life journey. You can find more at the above link.–

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Conflicts in “real life” and meditation

November 25th, 2009 by xunler 1 comment »

Question: I am into meditation since a year ago, I always find there is a conflict in real life and meditation, can you help to explain if I am on the right path?

Yes, you are right. Unless there is profound understanding about life cycles, the so called “real life” and meditation is on the opposite sides.

The “real life” that you are talking about is all about the outside, the glamorous, status and power which is all in the mind, in the society. While when we talk on the inside we are always talk of the no-mind or mindlessness. This is contradicting and it is happening every day even at every moment if you are alert and in awareness.

Things that are in the mind (or on the outside) cannot be fight against by using the inner (or meditation) because it will be like you are using the vast against a grain of sand on the beach, it is very foolish. Let me explain, things on the outside needs the ego, the mind, the mask that you put on every single day and your inner needs nothing.

In the ancient times, masters did not ask the disciple to go into meditation if he or she thinks that the disciple is not ready. But nowadays, information is available everywhere and whether the person is ready or not in meditation, he or she somehow has follow the trend without real understanding. This is obviously very dangerous because people may mistaken the master’s teaching and applied it on the mind and the ego which may cause big disasters in the human being.

First of all, do not apply what you have learned in meditation on the outside. Try to understand the experience that you have gain in meditation. Then look at it in a bigger picture. Slowly you will realized that whatever you have seen in the inside is even bigger than what you have experience at the outside before.

© by Xunler at http://lifejourneyanswer.com
—The author XunLer is a disciple from a great master is practicing meditation since 1999. Self-searching is the real route of all life journey. You can find more at the above link.–

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